Last lines from the captains

44 days of sheer pain is over, now people can concentrate in their work, oh wait. IPL is on its way. No, I’m not going to subscribe for it; too much of cricket is not good for health. To wind-up the cricket season, here is an imaginary dialogue given by the captains of the World Cup participating countries. Some are serious, some little funny and some political.

1. Michael Clark (Australia) – We didn’t sledge. Did we?

2. Brendon McCullam (New Zealand) – The final should be played in New Zealand.

3. MS Dhoni (India) – We won’t take it back.

4. AB DeVillers (South Africa) – Rain Rain Go Away

5. Angelo Mathews (Sri Lanka) – We have a mystery bowler, so mystery that we didn’t make him play.

6. Jason Holder (West Indies) – Curtly Ambrose was our bowling coach. Believe it!

7. Misbah-ul-Haq (Pakistan) – Our team is a best fielding side. Rahat Ali you are fired.

8. William Porterifield (Ireland) – We beat West Indies or West Indies lost to us!

9. Eoin Morgan (England) – I’m not from England, I’m from Ireland.

10. Elton Chigambura (Zimbabwe) – Brendon is leaving Zimbabwe, a spot is free, anybody to take?

11. Mohammed Nabi (Afghanistan) – Bullets, Tanks and Cricket Balls

12. Khurram Khan (UAE) – We are World XI

13. Preston Mommsen (Scotland) – Oh! Did we play in this World Cup?

Did we miss someone, yes here he is...

14. Musrafee Morthaza (Bangladesh) – That was a no ball! Right? Please..

RIP Australian Test Cricket

By the blogger

What should have been 4-0 Ashes victory for England went to 3-0 because Clarke pleaded all gods for the bad light in The Kia ( piss ) Oval on the final day of the 5th Test. So when he landed in Sydney he declared not to go to England again. 

Aleem Dar saying "Don't come near us, go away"

Except the 1st Test in Trent Bridge, nothing went right for Aussies. The weather-gods were so cruel to them in the 3rd Test. Only to accept their prayers in the 5th Test.

The series started with a PUNCH and ended with a PISS. Before the start of the series David “killer” Warner punched Joe “Baby Face” Root. As a punishment Warner went to South Africa to score 190 Runs against South Africa A, then he was recalled into the national team. 

After the last Test, some English players went for the leak on the Oval pitch. They taught a lesson or two for the England curators on how to water the pitch to keep it green. 

DRS was minced, chewed, scrambled and swallowed. Umpires decisions were criticized and all used a microscope to study it.

Silicon tapes were invented to negate hot-spots. How about inside-edge-on-to-the-pads ?

"The team once called as Invincible’s are dead now. RIP Australian Test Cricket."

Rumors are there that Australia will tour Afghanisthan for a five-Test match series. But the tour was boycotted by the Aussies terming security reasons.


**At the timing of writing this, Aaron Finch had kicked the English bowling in the 1st T20 by scoring 156 Runs.